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Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Day 3

I WANT A DRINK, I WANT A DRINK, I WANT A DRINK!!! OK, that's out! Today was a struggle. It shouldn't have been, I dropped my youngest at pre-school, went to my oldest's school to watch field day, took her to out for a girl's lunch and then picked youngest up from school. We got home, watched some TV, played and cooked dinner, and all I wanted to do was crawl out of my skin....

Why is this so freaking hard??? I was having what should have been a wonderful day with my kids and all I want is a drink! I am really hoping that this anxiety gets better...soon!! I was reading another blog about alcoholics and anxiety and Xanax (that blogger had the same thoughts that I am having!)....I would love a Xanax...anything to help with the anxiety, the depression, the pain, but alas...I would then be addicted to Xanax...trading one crutch for another.....what's a girl to do?

2 comments:

  1. Hang in there - it does get better, the skin-crawly anxiety. Every day you don't drink you are one day closer to that feeling going away (heck every hour you don't drink you are one hour closer to that feeling going away).

    The first few days are absolutely the hardest - and look at you! You're doing it!

    Keep on talking about it - it really does help.

    -Ellie

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  2. Thank you! Writing this really does help. I find that the cravings are a little less after I write it out. Thanks for listening to my rantings!

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